Two videos a new mother must watch

It isn't very often that I will post a video on my blog but I saw this women, a "New's Anchor", that spoke out to a bully that had defined her as 'Obese' and sent her a very critical email insulting her. What rung true to me while watching this was her statement

"This behaviour is learnt"

 This worries me that parents are bringing up children to be critical and this lady shown below has some very inspirational words to speak. I thought I might share this video in hope that other parents, like me, realize they aren't perfect and take more responsibility in how their child responds to other people.

Okay so the next video isn't exactly a "Must Watch" but after every bit of poo you wipe up, vomit you clean and crying you soothe, it's hard to remember the good times. Here is a bit of a light hearted video that will lift your spirits no matter what sort of day you are having! Check out this baby laughing hysterically at a dog eating popcorn.

Two things to think about both for the future and the appreciation of the present! A good, thoughtful night in this household anyway.

Breast vs Bottle feeding! Why the debate?

Why the debate my wonderful followers? This is such a spectacular time with your wee one the last thing you need is pressure coming from all angles and societial pressures to ruin it. The answer is simple, If you feel comfortable, adamant and good about breastfeeding then by all means breastfeed. If you don't want to breastfeed or can't for ANY reason at all, then bottle feed. It's your personal choice as a mother to decide. Forget outside opinions, sure, gather the facts but don't let anything else influence your decision.

The westernized countries, such as New Zealand are all about promoting breastfeeding, which is totally in their right to do but then, encourage mothers to do it behind closed doors. One of my good friends who recently had a baby has just travelled to Uganda with her baby and husband, she stated the other day that there was a "Very relaxed breastfeeding culture here actually, it's nice." There are no shirts sold with the pockets to hide the breasts, they just whip it out and feed their child. This is an awesome concept to those mothers that had 50 gazillion ties or clips to undo then make sure the child is in the right place with out showing all your goodies to the world. (by the way I was one of these mothers)

Here is my experience of breastfeeding and yes, it is only ONE person's experience but I hope that I am not the only one that felt or is feeling this way:

"My daughter was born 9 months(ish) ago, 5 weeks early and quite a surprise. I had absolutely no idea about breastfeeding except a short dvd on the benefits (not an instructional video which would have been far more useful). I was lucky enough that Summer  (Miss 9 Month) was kept in hospital for her Jaundice for a week or so as this allowed the lactation consultants to teach me everything they knew. Even so, I went home not fully aware of how to breastfeed properly, and struggled with my 2kg baby as to positions to hold her in. When I got home, we realised that formula couldn't factor into our budget at all that week so I struggled past the first week and had the result that every breastfeeding mother hoped for. Summer gained weight.  This should have made me happy, ecstatic, sane! But tired,grumpy, emotional me just wanted to scream out for a valid excuse to stop breastfeeding. The time wasn't as 'bonding' as described, I loved my daughter more than the world itself and although this sounded selfish, I wanted my body back. As I look back now, 9 months on, I realise that this isn't selfish, if I had given up breastfeeding at that point, I would have been a happier, more content, able and saner mother to Summer. Instead I was thoroughly upset almost consistently over the next few months and the guilt weighed heavily for thinking such selfish thoughts. I yelled and I screamed behind closed doors and felt beyond alone yet could feel the world judging me. My sister came to stay with me over this time and I had put on the facade that I was okay with breastfeeding, "I just whip it out now" I told her a week before she came. Her response, "oh you don't really just whip it out do you?" I laughed it off, racked with sadness that my own family had reservations. My best friend was the other extreme, "She should be sleeping through the night by now, your supply isn't going down is it?" Both of these people, my sister and friend, don't have children and people without children in my opinion should not offer their opinion! Only support, non-judgemental support. My soon to be brother-in-law was boarding with us at the time and was particularly unsupportive, leaving me with no other choice than to lock myself in my room every 3-4 hours. The one moment I was at peace with my emotions was when my aunty came for a few days to stay and told me that 'my mum had issues with breastfeeding' (my mum had passed away when I was a child) and my sister went to hospital severely dehydrated because mum wasn't comfortable to breastfeed her beneath the hounding eyes of all my uncles and other family. I could definitely relate as I had sometimes resettled Summer and fed her at a less public time, with her actually missing out. Expressing wasn't an option as I could only express 5mls at one sitting maximum.

Recalling my experience even now makes me so upset, as I feel the judgement on myself building up again. However at 4 months I called it quits before I suffered a mental breakdown. I weaned her onto her bottle within a week and after that life got so much easier. My fiancee took over her weekend night feeds and I managed a full nights sleep for the first time in 4 months. My emotional strength grew and I felt like I was enjoying my daughters company instead of counting down the minutes to the next feed. There are things that people don't tell you before birth and this is one of  them. I hope I'm not alone with my thinking but if I am, this burden on my shoulders seems to have lifted after sharing it with you all."

So in conclusion, whether it was my reservations or societies, I think that society needs to enforce open breastfeeding EVERYWHERE or let mothers make up their own minds without judgement. I don't advocate either way because the third option should be MYOB! 

Newborn Photography (With NZ Links)

So if you are like me and had far more important things on your to do list  than hiring someone to photograph your newborn then these tips, tricks and important information is perfect for a quick overview on how to find your Newborn Photographer.

What your photographer should provide?

Depending on price, Professional, experienced photographers should all provide or organize the following so it pays to ask in advance;

--- Safety First ---

This should be a given for a Newborn Photographer but it's definitely worth sorting out beforehand. If there are cushions placed below the baby then this should be done so the baby can not come to any harm. Personal items such as musical instruments should be photographed separately then added together so the baby is placed on a stable surface. 

--- The best time ---

The best time to get your babies photo is within the first 10 days as a newborn baby sleeps a lot, sleeping baby means there isn't going to be too much stress on you. No flailing, and fingers crossed, no crying makes for a great photo.

--- Heating ---

Naked or Just nappy baby photos are the best but naked baby means cold baby. Make sure if you are shooting at a photographers studio that they are supplying heating.

--- Variety of Props ---

Depending on style you want to make sure that the photographer has a great variety of specialized newborn props. Of course you don't want to take away from the main feature, your darling newborn, but an array of props will hopefully make a wonderful addition to each photo.

Where to find Great Newborn Photographers?

This is my darling who was premature so was unable to get an early newborn shot and boy did we pay. She was grumpy, crying, we picked a terrible location and we hired a cheap photographer. These shots are worth paying more for.

Since then I have been scouring photographer's sites and pages to find the best of New Zealand in Newborn Photography. I will link up their sites and locations (NZ) below, and if I gain permission, I will gradually add some of their examples so you can have an idea of excellent Newborn Photography.

----- Auckland (Waitakere) ---- "Zandy J Photography"

The top of my list of Newborn photographers or photographers in general is "Zandy J Photography" The image quality is exceptional, customers only have great feedback and the images speak for themselves. If you want beautiful photos of your newborn, there is no beating this photographer. 

----- Dunedin ----"Christina Jade Photography"

I love this photographer because of the natural feel that they bring to their shoots. They have an array of props for newborns and the photos look spectacular. The customer service seems friendly and comfortable. Check out their website here.

----- Christchurch --- "Kim Hamblin Photography"

The reason this photographer stuck out was that they focused on the baby, and built the images simplistically around them while still making them the main feature. The images are beautiful and eye catching.  

---- Wellington ---- "Antonia's Photography"

These images aren't over photoshopped allowing a definite natural feel to the photos. I featured this one as I love the construction of the images, so original and it feels like you are really in the moment.

These are all my favourite picks from the main centres but I definitely encourage you to look around as what I might like others may not. However these photographers listed above provide beautiful image quality and standard that should never be missed for such special moments.

Buying Handmade gifts in NZ

Is there more value in a handmade gift these days? As a busy mum (or dad), no one has time to scour markets, or local fairs for handmade products from the local grandmothers but with the internet, handmade items have never been so accessible. However I was passing through a little asian warehouse the other day and almost picked up a little costume for little 9 month old daughter to attend a wedding as all the handmade I scoured were so expensive.

Here are tips, tricks, and links to some great handmade items for your wee one.

Benefits to buying Handmade: 

-Helping others: Its plain and simple; big businesses will always be there but Working at Home mothers need your help to get of the ground.

- Higher Quality: Most of the products are sourced locally used to Handcraft which is good for the health of your children, no Chinese cheap fabric- bathed in 'who knows what' feces. The Quality will generally be excellent

-Custom sizing and design: It gives that personalized touch to everything. Lets face it, who doesn't enjoy seeing their name hanging on the wall.

Where to Find What?

Here are our top 10 Handmade stores:

Sewn clothing can look beautiful --- Especially on Kids but Handmade clothing can be really expensive as it is a fairly competitive market. We scanned around the NZ Handmade stores to do a vague price comparison. Here are our top ten Handmade item stores in NZ rated on quality, customer service, feedback and price ranging from clothes, decorations and toys. Enjoy:

#10- "Little Fae Handmade"

What I like about this store is the One-man-band or One-woman-band in this case but still keeping professionalism within the store. The clothes are reasonably priced with the pretty little piece below costing $20 + Postage. This is about what it would cost in one of the baby stores but this seems to guarantee quality and it turns up right at your front door to.

#9- "Arlie Girl & AG Boys Clothing"

Because of my love of tutus this Clothing store would be Number 1 but unfortunately the prices are a bit expensive for the everyday mums. However the clothing is exceptional quality, it has a large variety of clothing, both girls, boys and adults. Fairy dresses complete sets for girls (like the picture shown below)  are around $55 which isn't actually overpriced for all the effort of designing and creating them. I love the friendly and homely vibe of this shop!

#8- "Pepi's Boutique"

Just the word Boutique always catches my attention, and this wee shop deserves. Run again by another one-woman-band, it is a range of beautiful, unique custom designed clothing. A dress like the one below is about $36 which for the quality, design, colouring and finish is beyond reasonable.

#7- "Sew In Love NZ" 

Owls along with tutus are my new favorite obsession and this online store makes the cutest wee owls ever.

They are only $20 and a must have for any owl fashion lover (Owls are totally in right now)

Apart from the owls this shop has a lot to offer. I try to critique well so mothers have the chance to do a quick evaluation, but its hard to find anything at fault here. They have a range of headbands starting at $10 which I believe is well priced and they have a clearance section on their website (Click here to visit) 

#6 - "Monki Business - Sock Monkeys and Softies"

They sell Sock Monkeys (amongst other things)! How is this not the cutest thing you have ever seen and so original to. They do charge out of the reasonable range, you're looking at around $45 for the one below but boy I can imagine it must be quite hard to make!! Without price entering the equation, it seems very professional, there is great feedback and they sell owls too!

#5- "Kate's Paper Dresses"

A precious new piece of wall art that can be custom designed. What a wonderful idea! So impressed with the quality and detail gone into these. I think the only thing that lets them down is the price but they would make a beautiful addition to any wee girls (Or big girls) room!
The one's below are about $40 + Postage.

#4- "Sammi3's Handmade Embellishments"

I'm not usually a big fan of card makers. In fact I will generally pick the funniest one from the warehouse and be done with it but these cards are beautiful! Especially with Valentines just around the corner! Reasonably priced cards for what they are at about $5 each. Also they offer canvases although the prices aren't clearly displayed, the photography is fairly average but the product seems to speak really well for itself.

#3- "The Stitch Witch"

Whoever can spend hours doing thousands of stitches on 14 count Aida Cloth is full of patience (or a mother in that regard) I like the customization of this site. Reasonably priced and personalized handmade craft doesn't get much better than this. It does lack professionalism but makes it up with heart. I like that each piece is designed by them. It covers so many aspects of gift giving as well from weddings to babies. The piece below is priced at $15.

#2- "Choo Choo Couture"

It seems that this is New Zealand's best kept secret. Such talent and a beautiful range! Worth checking out just to revel in the 'How she does it'. Reasonably priced and such rare designs. Professional and usually sold out before the picture is available. The item below is priced at $35 + Postage.

#1- "Cadenza Bella - Tutu's, Clip holders and more"

Why is this number 1? Because this shop wins out in all categories, customer service, feedback and most importantly price. The clothing is amazing and the hard work that goes into it speaks for itself. Check out this wee beauty for only $25.



All of these shops are wonderful! I suggest you check out each of them. Help other mothers out, customize your gifts and have fun designing while you are at it.


Etsy- Beyond all other sites this is the one you must visit to scour for Handmade items. Etsy makes sure the shops are reputable. Definitely worth looking at.

Etsy Links:
Little Fae Handmade
The Stitch Witch
The Knitting Inn
Cadenza Bella

FOOTNOTE: All photos were taken from the pages of those businesses they are linked with. These are not the property of the blogger.

What to buy a New Mum!!!

So my sister is heading of to a baby shower in three weeks and wanted to know what she should a buy a first time mother. As a first time mother myself, who has countless times over the last few months wanted more essential items for Summer (Baby girl) than some of the appreciated yet useless gifts I have decided to create a little guide as to what I would be ever so thankful for in the first few months of baby's life.

#1 ITEM: A BABY WEARING WRAP: Instead of that "Baby's 1st Christmas Santa Stocking" that is only going to be used ONCE on one day of her whole life, how about buying a wrap that will leave mum hands free for those essential times of the day when she actually wants to move. Find a Stockist of the Moby wrap! This will be the most appreciated gift in the world. (NOTE: Do not buy any cheap imitation as the bubs safety is at risk)

#2 ITEM: A MAGIC MITTEN: I only discovered these the other day and I want a time machine to go back and make those first few months so much easier. "The Magic Mitten is a non-invasive, hand-held baby soother that gently and safely calms upset babies - like magic!" 

#3 ITEM: AN EXCERSAUCER: I  know a bit expensive but go in with a few friends and get a cheap evenflo. Anything to keep them entertained while mum is having a shower, or even just whizzing a brush through her hair. Hell, even scour trademe for one. 

#4 ITEM: A CO-SLEEPER BABY BASSINETT: Another big purchase but again get a few people to go in for it. Settling a baby is so hard and co-sleeping becomes an essential part of a mothers life even though frowned upon it happens at one point or another. A safe co-sleeper will ease the mums mind and decrease the risk of SIDS

#5 ITEM: A BABY MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTION: There are a range of baby mags to subscribe to but if you get a 6 month or year subscription for that mum, she won't feel so alone. Try Treasures, ohbaby etc. 

If in doubt, just ask what they need instead of assume, its a time when they will work out exactly what they need. But mostly company, meals are highly appreciated.

Kids & Pasta

Yes kids are messy, but so is pasta. Combining these two wonderful things may actually make your life far easier. Who cares if the pasta is cooked Al Dente, the kids certainly don’t and unless you forget to prepare water with your pasta, follow the tips below and you can’t possibly fail.

Foolproof tips for working with Pasta and Kids:

Tip #1: The slimier the better, kids love slimy things that they can squeeze in your hands, Pasta like Ditalini, kids find hilarious with their short tube nature. Make a little warm tomato dip on the side for dipping fun.

Ditalini Tomato Dip:

200g of Canned Italian tomatoes (or mashed fresh herbed tomatoes)

2 tablespoons of Brown sugar

2 teaspoons of Worcester sauce

¼ cup of finely chopped red onions

¼ cup of finely chopped celery

2 cloves of garlic, crushed

1 tablespoon of olive oil

Heat butter and oil in a pan, add garlic, red onions and celery and fry for a couple of minutes, add brown sugar, and once dissolved add the remaining ingredients, simmer for up to 10 minutes and its all done.

Tip #2: Ravioli is by far my favourite to cook for the kids. 3 pieces of this with the right filling is the most nutrition the kids will get for the week.

Variations for filling include:

Pureed vegetables with lentils

Cheese and lean mince with tomato sauce

Chicken and asparagus

As long as it is able to fit in the ravioli, it works so let your imagination run wild.

After the ravioli is cooked you can make little tomato sauce faces on them or if the kids are old enough, let them go for it.

Tip #3:  

Fusilli bucati is the coolest pasta around. Of course you can use any springy, coiled pasta but this is my personal favourite. Make a wee pesto with crushed cashews and parmesan and they will be entertained for hours.

The last tip is a quick reminder that might save you a carpet cleaner, ALWAYS put a mat down when working with pasta. Failing any of these tips, just remember kids love entertaining food, grab out some food colouring and make it exciting. Make sure you remember to enjoy it after all that, just don’t expect the pasta to be Al Dente!

Postnatal: Don't worry, Be Happy

“Welcome to Motherhood” They said only a few days, sometimes hours before they push you out the door of the hospital. No manual, no 24 hour support, yet somehow you wake up after 6 months from the first ‘through the night sleep since baby’s birth’ and realise that you did it! You took on motherhood and won (even though you certainly don’t feel particularly victorious). Sure you worried about them constantly through the first months of their life but you were far too tired to let it form into any ideas.

If you find yourself starting to get more and more anxious everyday they grow, have a quick look at your diet before heading for any medication from the doctor. Of course if it is serious, by all means, don’t hesitate in seeking help but if you just feel generally worried and anxious about your baby’s wellbeing or motherhood in general, spend a few days working out the kinks in your diet by taking some of these tips into account.

Tip #1- The “No No Foods”: fried foods, unrefined sugars, and alcoholic beverages. I know it’s all the fun stuff and I am not saying to drop them all together but when some worry in the pit of your stomach starts to appear don’t overload on the KFC or McDonalds that sounds crazily appetizing.

Tip #2- I could simply tell you to eat more wholegrain foods but the first thing you might do is pop to the store and pick the most highly commercialised ‘Wholegrain’ bread. Instead of chucking it in because the label says it “wholegrain”, ignore the screaming child in the trolley, and quickly turn over for the ingredients- scan for more than 20% Wholegrain content guaranteeing that not all of the health benefits have been taken from the bread in the production process. Wholegrain food is scientifically proven to provide chemicals that become a calming neurotransmitter aka “your anxiety levels will decrease.”

Tip #3- Sushi!!! That’s right when you are feeling taken over by worry, head out to your favourite sushi bar and get some seaweed into you. If your magnesium levels are low, this can cause increased anxiety levels, seaweed will get that magnesium content right back to the level it needs to be. Who doesn’t love treating themselves to some Teriyaki chicken. Yum!!!

Tip #4- Drink!!! No this isn’t where alcohol makes a reappearance, however Water is the key. In fact dehydration is the main cause of stress or worry in 25% of cases so carry a bottle with you on those days that you just can’t handle that worry or those busy days where your diet habits may be lacking.

Tip #5- Reward yourself- I didn’t want to mention this any earlier but chocolate without the added sugars and milk reduces the stress hormone in the body. Just remember the darker the better.

Being a mother is the most terrifying job in the world but just remember that even though your baby might cause you so much worry, exclude the anxiety and you will realise how rewarding each day is with them. You are doing a fantastic job!