WAHM--- The 10 fulltime jobs they actually do!!! :)

What is the meaning of WAHM?

WAHM means "Work At Home Mom"

An extended meaning ---- not only do WAHM's work every hour of the day that their child/children are awake, entertaining, feeding, washing and cleaning between the daylight hours or sometimes not so daylight hours. When they are entertained, fed, washed and cleaned and mothers have a quiet minute, this is when they morph into their secret identity "The WAHM"! Their powers are super sensitive hearing incase the child/children are up to something they shouldn't be up to and they grow a pair of eyes out of the back of their head so they are able to split their attention between the child/children and whatever task they are trying to complete. 

Once the other half arrives home, WAHM needs to get tea cooked, dishes completed, child/children bathed and bedded, then return to the task at hand. This means that she might not finish until the early hours of the morning. 

WAHM's generally work 7 days a week and do it all for a particularly low return.

Why would anyone want to be a WAHM?

I sometimes wonder this? My organisational skills are excellent and I still have trouble making time for everyone and everything! However, even though we get a ridiculously low hourly wage, it's enough income to help make ends meet at the end of the week. I worked a full time job just last month for a while and it pained me every time I walked away from Miss 1! I also realized nobody else wanted to hear all about Miss 1 in all her excitement, so it turned out that I really had nothing in common with any of my colleagues. Being a WAHM is sort of an inbetween compromise for those mums that can't handle "Just being mums" but also want something for themselves! 

How to become a WAHM?

I could give you a step-by-step guide but where is the fun in that. However I will give you a little advice.  Find an idea, and run with it. Don't give up! Realise that it might be slow to start of with but you just grow and grow and grow and look forward to the exciting times. Support other WAHM's! In fact as long as you aren't in the same industry as them, I'm sure you could probably give them a message to hear their story or advice on how to become a WAHM. 

NZ WAHMS-- that you need to visit--

BABY BANZ NZ- Run by Andrea Little- sun & sound safety gear for babies & kids

 

Pepi's Boutique - Handmade clothing for girls!   & Mano Rato - Handmade clothing for Boys! Both run by Krystal Pires

Baby Life Magazine Bizzy Shopping and 2cute - All run by the wonderful Jackie Procter

Bubs Bibs n Bobs- Run by Cushla Jaquiery

Olly Polly- Run by Tess Burnett - Olly Polly is a Merino baby wear company that will keep your little ones warm and snug in Winter and cool in Summer.

Timmy and Tilly's Preloved Kids Clothes and Accessories- Run by Jo Hardie 

Red Riding Hood Yarns- Run by Hannah Gordon

Or head over to the Hive -  a buzzing online shopping experience showing off small kiwi businesses (mostly wahm  ) 

What Nappies Do I Use?

Between working out how much they weighed 39 days ago at the last plunket meeting, price weighing up, working out which gender your child is (it's probably been a long day) the choice in nappies is RIDICULOUS!!!

Cloth nappies? 

To those on a budget an essential! Don't even bother with the one's you have to fold, clip and turn three times just head online, purchase a few dome ups with liners (either flushable or bamboo) and you'll never look back. Flushable linings are a god send especially when it comes to 'I'm gonna crap all over the place mum.'

I recommend Nappy Needz as they have adjustable sizes saving you even more long term!

What I have learnt about disposable nappies:

The great debate between Treasures and Huggies.

Treasures Newborns contain EVERYTHING better during the first few months. NOTE for first time mothers: remember to pull the side flaps inbetween the crutch out. These are also a few dollars cheaper than huggies

As you move up (10-15kg toddler) the Treasures waist band is a little small (or babys tummy a little big) so for better support and 'poo management' I suggest paying the few extra dollars for the huggies as you will be changing outfits all day with treasures.

Don't bother with any other brands until they get older and only need it for caution as NO other nappy even absorbs fluids and they end up with wet clothes constantly.

Of course every baby is different, but at least you have somewhere to start for now!

Four great reasons we regret having kids

Does anyone else sometimes throw down the towel and yell I WANT MY OLD LIFE BACK! You just got a serious case of the ‘Grass is greener on the other side’ syndrome. But was it greener? Lets take a look back and see aye?

1st reason why we want to throw them back - although not literally because that would be completely unfair a second time!!!

“I miss going out”

It is such an effort paying a babysitter, finding the energy or even enthusiasm to trudge to the local cinema these days let alone partying. When you do it’s not that enjoyable anyway realizing that you could be spending the same money on next weeks grocery bill.

Spending quiet nights in or 'family outings' is as good is it gets for you right now.....

But do you really want to go out and spend xxxx amount of dollars, vomit your stomach lining out and end up naked on a park bench? 


No you say? You say now "I don't want to get drunk, just a night out would be nice." I call B.S.!!! You want to go out, piss it up, drunk dial your ex boyfriend to tell him that you are still in love and dance with your mirror self all night long! Yea.... it's not going to end well and if you didn't do this in your teens you are just going to be that weird, sleezy cougar in the corner that everyone is yelling "Go home Aunty, Your Drunk!!!!!"

2nd Reason

"I miss the sex"

Are you missing that roaring lust filled love making you use to partake in! Is it all 'crap have we have we just woken her" or hurrying through before she starts screaming! Lacking the passion and fire in your love life? You're preaching to the choir here!

However have you not heard the old rhyme "First comes love, second comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage." You can't have your cake and eat it too! If you are having wild sex nineteen times a day, you are going to slip up buddy and then comes a baby in a baby's carriage.

3rd Reason

"I miss the me time"

So long weekend is it?? Oh cool! How about the easter bunny pops around and changes the nappies and spends the day entertaining the children? 

How about we go on holiday? What's that? The hotel doesn't appreciate screaming children?

"That bubble bath went cold I was in there for so long" said no mother ever!

Instead its all about hacking at your legs while keeping the waterfall of shampoo out of your eyes and ignoring the screaming baby that you have left in the portacot. Talk about Seeeexxxxyyyy!!!

As a parent you just don't get 'me' time..... at all.... ever.... zilch.

What you do get is snuggles, smiles, giggles and gas, lots of gas.

4th Reason

"I miss having space"

So you are no longer 'No Friend Nigel', in fact if anything you wish your second Aunty twice removed would stop dropping around every five minutes when you finally got a little nap out of your little one. You should feel so loved with sooo many people filling your house, and attending every little event of your life, oh wait no they were just calling by to see how the wee one was? "My how she's grown in the last hour" they say.

You and your family have never been closer, 'a little too close', as in NO BOUNDARIES. Zilch. I'm horribly reminded of the conversation my aunty had with me a couple of weeks ago about how I should be 'putting out' (*Shudder*) more for the spouse...... talk about awkward!
However a few days ago I was talking to my grandad and realised that family won't be around forever and it's nice having the extra hand, opinion, shove or however else you wish to interpret it.


In all honesty the drunk, sex-crazed, no friend nigel of  the past seems the best place for it to stay as it seems I lack a certain desire to revisit it now. Next time I throw down that towel, it might just be into the laundry basket heading to the line like the domesticated "Mother" I've become! 



Remember to head over and vote for us at Top Mommy Blogs if you have a minute between those ninety million kiddies! 

The importance of mothers

With mother's day coming up (in NZ), I have taken the time out to remember the importance of the mother role within a child's life.

                             My Mum and I 

My mother left us far too early when I was just 12 and although everyone thinks that "Mothering" just finishes when children turn 18 or leave home, the amount of things I realized she missed out on in the past 12 years has been astonishing. Not just the big moments but also the little things she did to keep our family close.

Role model- No matter how much they turn their nose up at your style, your children think you are the most beautiful woman in the world. I remember mum use to diet and I use to be confused as to why, because she was absolutely perfect and flawless in my eyes. Children's Self-image is learnt from example, share your inner confidence with them to give them a better idea of what inner & outer beauty can mean.

Opinion- Nobody's opinion matters more than a mothers, failures can be made 100x worse by adding a mother's disappointment in the mix. However things always look brighter when a mother is first to forgive. Constructive criticism in a loving fashion is probably the best way to get a point across.

Encouragement- Nothing beats having your mother there every Saturday morning watching and cheering at the early netball game, or in the front row at your piano recital. Even though they might not seem to appreciate anything now, children will treasure these memories for the rest of their lives.

Learning about Love- The most important thing any child learns from their mum is love. How to love, be loved and treat those they love. Those sporatic hugs, giggles and kisses you share in the early years will be focus of much happiness in the later years of life. Teaching healthy relationship building is an important factor for their future relationships.

Potential- Children will only limit themselves depending on the way their mother limits themselves. I suggest getting handy around the house, not limiting gender roles and having some fun along the way. This will teach your child that no matter their gender, age or any other factors, if they want to be something, they just have to work for it.

I have only touched on the few ways that mothers shape their daughters, and when you are having one of those days where you feel a little useless, feel free to touch base on here and realize that you someones whole world and even after you're gone, they will never forget how blessed they are for having you as a mother.

Happy Mother's day NZ

Born to be a mother..... NOT!

In life there are a lot of people you see that you know are going to make great mothers. Those caring, gentle souls that are impossible to dislike and are far to optimistic for their own good are put on this earth to make wonderful mothers. But for the other 99% of the population, nothing about mothering comes naturally. However, if you are pregnant or a new mother and worrying that you might being doing have done everything wrong, revel in the fact that this alone makes you one of the most caring mothers around. 

Guilt- Plays a huge part in mothering. I have felt guilty all of about 2 times in the last few months. Once was when Summer fell of the bed when I turned around for two minutes. In fact I don't know who was crying the hardest me or her. The other time I felt "mother guilt" was when I realized I wasn't spending enough  time of my day with her instead I was catching up on my 'BIG BROTHER' addiction.

Let Go of the Past--  There is nothing you can do but learn from mistakes you make, forgive yourself so your child can learn to forgive herself to.

Vanity- I guess another word for this can be ego. I find myself shusshing Summer a lot in public because I am worried what others might think of her loud babbling but at home I can't think of a better noise. God forbid if she cries in public it's like my dignity has disappeared down the toilet. I've realised lately that I have to stop this, as when she gets older she will take it that I am disappointed in her and not realise it's my own vanity that is stopping her from having the fun she deserves.

Let them be kids

Disappointment- I guess this sort of falls into the vanity category. I notice I seem to be a very competitive mother for my own glory not Summer's. I get so envious when other kids reach a milestone before Summer. Walking has been a large thing where I have had to learn patience as you can't push her to learn this! At the moment she is fairly content on crawling her way to freedom and at the ripe old age of 1, I'm starting to see why I shouldn't worry!

We spend the first few years teaching them to Stand and Speak and the next decade telling the to sit down and shut up!

Having written these down in list format, I feel that I have started to address the fact that I need to make more effort in these categories to ensure that Summer enjoys her childhood as much as possible. In fact I would love others to share some self-improvement tips with me to help me along. Thank you so much for sharing in this moment of honesty from my part and I hope you all realise what wonderful mothers you all are!!!

"I read somewhere"

The most overused phrase used in the mothering language has to be “I read somewhere”. I remember one of the freakiest things about pregnancy was when my sister would ring me up to let me know about what she had read about pregnancy, birth or newborns somewhere that week. Gullibility is a definite weakness of mine, having landed me in trouble multiple times during my life. In fact it almost killed me when I was younger and my sister told me that spiders would nest in my mouth whilst I was sleeping, so I taped my nose and my mouth up with heavy duty duct tape and proceeded to fall asleep. Turns out you need both of these to breath. So when she rung me with a story of “I read somewhere that women who are pregnant pee their pants on a regular basis…. well I went straight out and bought some decent panty liners because there was no way I was having that happen in public! Little did I know that at 13 weeks I practically had nothing to worry about at that point.

Once I got past the supposed foot swelling, nightmare ridden, sweaty pregnant phase, I was so stressed about childbirth that it was probably a godsend that my little tub of joy came 5 weeks early. I had no time to read any text books, watch any dvds or listen to the several reasons why I should pass on pain relief! In just 48 hours, the only influence I had was my best friend, 10 minutes with my midwife and a 2 minute checkup hourly from the hospital nurse. This was probably the best way to have done it, no “I read somewhere that if you drink this [Insert old wives tale] labour comes on faster”, or “I read somewhere that if you push too hard you can damage your tailbone”

Pregnancy and Childbirth don’t even come close to the “I read somewhere” quotes about the Newborn stage.

Here are my favourites:

“I read somewhere that cloth nappies are just as simple as disposable nappies”

“I read somewhere that you just have to sleep when baby sleeps”

“I read somewhere that co-sleeping is a terrible idea”

“I read somewhere that Breast is best”

“I read somewhere that you can never tell if baby is getting enough breast milk so you should top them up with formula”

“I read somewhere that you should start a perfect minute-by-minute routine from the early stages”

Most of these contradictory phrases weren’t even backed up with any sources whatsoever or any reliable sources. But I just loved how if they read it somewhere or heard it from someone who read it from somewhere it was instantly a fact that I had to take into account as a mother from their expert non-mother opinion. Fair to say I become a lot less gullible when I became a mother.

There are two places you need to receive advice from as a mother and that is your GUT and INSTINCT! Well that’s what I read somewhere!

Online resources for mothers

One useful thing for mothers is to build a positive community of online resources to gain knowledge and advice to help us through this magical period. I have collated some of favourites, mostly New Zealand based online blogs, magazines, links and websites that provide a range of opinions, facts and community between mothers.

The Domestic Wannabe-
A blog I follow religiously! WARNING: This blog contains photos of some of the cutest kids ever! You have to read this blog for some amazing insight into motherhood and the joys it contains. I highly suggest for tips and advice to add this to your favourites. I think with the combination of amazing photography and highly relatable stories, this is fun and inspiring to read for any mother.

Baby Life Magazine-
I can't recommend this place enough. It doesn't just focus around baby necessities but also includes a directory of other useful thing like Health and Wellbeing businesses, Learning and education centres etc. I love the website (Click here to visit) because it is easy to use and holds an array of great information. I highly enjoy their status updates on facebook as it is always different, inspiring and interesting, I would suggest reading everyone of them just for entertainment.

The Baby View-
Wow! I have been a facebook fan of The Baby View for a while now and have only visited their online business directory for some contact details. However I just finished scouring their website (Click here to visit) and couldn't be more impressed at the range of helpful advice and tips that this website offers. It has a big focus on baby related businesses which is really helpful for mothers wanting a certain product, they also have recipes and a list of articles. A website definitely to store for a later read, but  like their page on facebook as it will provide a lot of resources that might make your life a little bit easier!

These are just a few of my favourites, and I am pleased to let my amazing fans know that the awesome "Jackie" from Baby Life Magazine has taken time out of her busy schedule to write a blog for next week's entry! Make sure you take a listen out for her expert advice!!!